Had a patient last night that just turned all my cranks. She was funny, pissy, and prim all rolled into one. First thing I had spelled her name wrong on my consent form (seeing as how the day nurse was hogging the chart and I couldn't get any lables). With my fine 50 + eyesight I read an "R" as a "K", so I got my first dressing down due to my inability to spell. This progressed to the "Why the hell haven't I got my Nicotine patch, yet, it's been 3 hours?" Well if you've ever worked in a hospital and got sucked into pharmacy hell, you know 3 hours is really just a short wait...figuratively speaking that is.
One hour later I was able to finally present my patient with her Nicotine patch. She wanted me to put it on "good" so it wouldn't fall off. As soon as I put it on her daughter encouraged her to *breath deep* to get all the *smoke*. Oh, and she was serious!!!! I explained that it was absorbed through the skin. At this point the patient reaches over and scratches the patch, and sniffs. (HUH??) Then she asks..."What? They don't come in scratch and sniff flavors?".
Oh, and my patient mentioned that she was from Kansas...her exact remark..."How would you like to be raised in Wichita Kansas and be named Dorothy?????"
Toto...we're not in Kansas anymore.
Follow the yellow brick road.......